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mother of octuplets

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Post by rocknrollmommy616 Tue Feb 10, 2009 11:55 pm

what was she thinking? I am watching dateline and i just want to hit this woman. you know, i understand not wanting to "dispose" of the embryos, but sometimes doing that is much less traumatic than you bringing 8 more children into a household where there are already 6 kids! Not to mention this woman does not have a job and she is forcing her parents to take care of these babies! I don't mean to be a horrible person, but I hope CPS takes some of her kids from her and gives them to people who can't have any. She should have put them up for adoption, or given the embryos to another couple. That's what is sad, she tries to say that she had to have them implanted because they deserved to be born. Well that's nice and all but they deserve to be born into a home where the parent(s) could provide for them. I have one baby and we are struggling to provide for him! I am also really waiting to see that fertility doctor get his license revoked. Apparently they aren't supposed to implant more than 2 or 3 embryos and he did 6 every time! Not to mention, after 2 or 3 babies, the doctor should have been like, "Hey, you know I can't allow you to use this treatment anymore." She says she used the same doctor every time, but her mother claims she spoke to her original fertility guy and told him plz, don't do this for her anymore, so her daughter went somewhere else. I think the daughter is trying to cover up for herself and this doctor. She is gunna get in a heap of trouble.... oh man, sometimes people are just soooo stupid.
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Post by Guest Wed Feb 11, 2009 1:06 am

I do think it is crazy as well. It would not be so bad if she had a DH or even SO to help her in taking care of the children. I do not see how on earth she is going to take care of 14 children on her own as she said she has been doing. Really she has been relying on her parents but I am sure they do not want to watch 14 children esp with 8 being newborns(talk about little sleep). I also think she will indefinitely have to rely on assistance to take care of them. There is no way even if she worked that she could solely rely on her paychecks to pay rent bills food and the daily needs of herself and the kids like laundry diapers wipes etc. I mean do not get me wrong I am on assistance right now only because dh is trying to find work and such but that woman she just went out and had 8 more babies on top of the 6 she was already struggling to care for.Kind crazy. I pray God's blessing upon her and the children But I too hope that when they are investigating that they make sure before letting her take the babies home that she is able to take care of all of them plus the other children she has at home.

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Post by mythreesons Wed Feb 11, 2009 10:03 am

She is on assistance. It was found out that she gets food stamps and 3 of her children get money for disability.Now don't get me wrong, it's ok to get assistance when you need it, but its not ok to use it forever or to continue to have more kids who will also need assistance.Did she think that the food stamps just come from some nice people who felt like donating?!This lady needs to have a psychological exam. It wouldn't be bad if she had a JOB to be able to support them, but she doesn't.It doesn't matter to me if she is married or single, but it really pisses me off that knowing how bad our economy is right now, she would get pregnant on purpose knowing she doesn't have a job.And if I were her mom or dad I'd be pissed off because she said she had a dysfunctional childhood because she was an only child. Not to mention that she's already living there with her current 6 kids. Again, and NOT working!!! I'm sorry I just think it's wrong to continue having children when you aren't working. She's now going to profit off her kids by having book deals and tv deals...That we end up in the end paying for!Ok I'm going to stop now because I get more mad every time I think about it...
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Post by Kim Wed Feb 11, 2009 10:14 am

How did she finance the fertility treatments? Most insurances doen't cover them...and I am sure if she was on state medical they weren't covered...I deffinitly think she needs a psych eval.
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Post by ladydy Wed Feb 11, 2009 11:12 am

She got a $165k settlement from a job injury. I would assume that is how she paid for it.
I've heard that she was expecting all this free stuff and companies aren't offering it up b/c of the situation. Which I do hate to see those babies suffer. She probably thought she would be another John & Kate, who have gotten rich off having all those babies...BUT, didn't do it for that purpose.
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Post by tweetie462 Wed Feb 11, 2009 12:33 pm

OMG! This lady needs some serious help!!! And the dr who implanted the embryos needs a serious eval too!! I hope she doesn't get all the media endorsements...that would be so wrong to reward her for being so damn stupid!
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Post by mnelson80 Wed Feb 11, 2009 6:06 pm

I totally agree with Diana - I think she thought everyone would oogle and help and give her tv shows and stuff. I heard she asked Oprah for $2 Million to come on her show and share her story.

I had been wondering how she paid for the IVF too.. I had no idea there was a settlement.

The whole thing is crazy. I'm with Shannon.. I get mad everytime I think about it!
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Post by Guest Wed Feb 11, 2009 6:14 pm

Wow I just re read what Shannon Wrote. If she is on food stamps I bet she gets a couple thousand now with all them kids and not working. Because my cousin was on assistance and had 7 children plus her and her hubby and they allowed he over 1000... crazy. I wonder if she is on wic or not... if they allow her the standard for each baby she would be getting like 72 cans of formula a month..that is crazy.. if she is Just wait until they turn 1 and the milk and juice starts coming my goodness Wow.. I agree with PP it does make me a bit mad too mostly with the dr who did the IVF and thought she needed 6(that turned into 8 ) more kids on top of the 6 she had with no job and living with her parents. I think him and her should have to foot the bills for all of this and his license should be stripped..crazy dr and her tubes should be mandated to be tied by a judge

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Post by MichelleL Wed Feb 11, 2009 7:07 pm

As most of you know Dawson was conceived thru IVF so my take on this lady might be a little different. I have conflicting feelings on what has happened in this case. I want to explain something about embryos before I comment though. She had 6 embryos implanted and got the octups but she also had 6 embryos implanted when she had a single and a twin pregnancy. Something most people do not realize about embryos is that they are not all "perfect". When you have an embryo it is graded on a scale from 1 to 4. 1 being the best (meaning its cells are the right size and dividing correctly) and 4 being the lowest grade (meaning its cells might be odd shaped or there could be too many or not enough divisions). She could (and I am purely speculating) have had sub-standard embryos to begin with. To give an example....I had 9 eggs extracted from my ovaries. Out of the 9 eggs only 5 fertilized when mixed with my dh's sperm. Out of the 5 that actually fertilized only 3 survived. Against the advice of my Endo we had all 3 embryos implanted into my cervix. It was suggested that we have 2 implanted, which at first was fine with us, until we found out only 1 embryo can not be frozen for later implantation. Our third embryo would have been thrown away.....and we couldn't live with that. The 2 that were suggested to implant were a grade 4 and the 3rd was only a grade 2. Out of the 3 embryos I had ONE Dawson. So I guess what I am saying is it might seem like the doctor gave her bad advice but good embryos don't always develop into a pregnancy and we don't know what grade her embryos were given. Also, it's only the first part of the IVF that is so expensive. The hormones, blood work, U/S, exams....that all adds up. Ten years ago it was well over $20k. However, if you freeze embryos having them implanted is very inexpensive....about $1500 because you don't need all of the hormones, ect. You do have to pay storage fees so maybe she was running out of money for the storage fees and either had to use what she had or they would be disposed of....I don't know. I do know if those were my baby's and I either had to implant them or let them be thrown in the trash, I'd have them implanted and pray to God for their lives. That being said, I am giving her the benefit of the doubt and what's in my heart knowing how it feels to want something so badly.

My other opinion is.....the doctor was running some kind of trial study for a new med or product and she was his guinea pig. Of course, happily being his experiment hoping she would get paid interviews, a book deal, a tv show, or whatever. Watching what TLC has done for Jon & Kate Gosslin could easliy have an impact on someone in her situation.....a zillion kids and no money. Hell, they just bought a $1mill+ house and have had so many things donated on top of a series that pays them a reported $65K per episode...she could have been seeing $$$ signs. And the doc could have been seeing them too!

She reminds of Bill Clinton when he answers questions. She avoids questions or answers them so vaguely I don't think some of her responses can even be called answers. She has also lied about receiving public assistance so her motives are definatly in question.

I just wanted to say my 2cents. I really hope she is genuine but from the surface she acts like a "I'm gonna get everything I can" type of person no matter who's dime she is spending.
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Post by rocknrollmommy616 Wed Feb 11, 2009 9:48 pm

I'm with shannon, i would not be b*tching about her having so many kids if she had a friggin job! I know she injured her back, but please, if her injury doesn't stop her from chasing after her kids(or carrying 8 in her belly!) then, she should work. I know she is going to school, but if you are a single parent, you NEED to work. My mom was divorced after she had all of us and she had to get a real job! Sometimes you have to sacrifice your wants for the needs of your children. I just don't think the government should be paying for her stupidity.

Michelle - I have no problem with IVF. I am sooo for it! I mean she wanted a big family, and after her inital six kids, she shouldn't have been allowed to have more. I mean, look even adoptive parents HAVE to have at least one income to adopt a child. They wouldn't just go, "Oh, you have no job, here's a kid anyways." If you have to have stipulations put on adoption, i think you should have the same mandatory checklist for IVF treatment. They need to be sure that the parent(s) has an income and can support a family. I mean, how reckless is it for that doctor to have done that when he knew she already had 6 other kids? He should have refused treatment. It's different with you michelle, you are a responsible parent with a husband (I'm not saying you HAVE to be married to have kids) who has a job! And at the time you had one two, correct? I'm sorry, I'm just very opinionated about this kind of situation. In this bad economy she should be taking money away from people who really need it b/c they are jobless, just because she was stupid enough to go get IVF after she already had 6 kids! I'm sorry, im done ranting...
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Post by mythreesons Wed Feb 11, 2009 10:52 pm

Every article I read makes me more and more mad, but it's like driving by a car accident and you can't help but look. There's a website now to go to where you can leave a comment for the family or make a donation...It took everything in me not to write something nasty. She is getting somewhere between $490 and $540 per month in food stamps according to 2 different articles I read...Oh and the taxpayers in CA may now be responsible for her hospital bill...LOVELY!!! I'm so glad I don't live there. And she doesn't consider the food stamps to be "welfare". Seriously?!

MichelleL- I understand about the IVF. But she had 6 embryos, so it's not like she had to throw them away.I don't care if she had 50 kids, if she had a way to support them. I too understand what its like to want something sooo badly you'd do anything to get it.But, she had six kids.It's not like she didn't have any.You did it to get your beautiful boy Dawson. But you could also support him. Thats why I'm so mad personally. It just really makes me mad that she had to have these kids(I'm not saying abortion at all) when she already had a large number of kids and she has no way to pay for them, and that my tax dollars go toward feeding her kids and not my own. I don;t get financial help because DH "makes too much money".We made about $70,000 last year. Which isn't too shabby considering my layoff but we're trying to repay a huge amount of debt instead of filing bankruptcy. That's what bothers me.That and our economy is in the toilet and a woman with 6 kids decides she needs more kids and has no way to pay for them...Ok I'm done ranting now...
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Post by mythreesons Wed Feb 11, 2009 10:55 pm

LOL Bekah I think I pretty much typed everything that you did just in slightly different words.
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Post by mythreesons Wed Feb 11, 2009 11:08 pm

http://abcnews.go.com/video/playerIndex?id=6835473&affil=wsyr

Ok I hope that this link works...This woman definetly isn't stable mentally. Seriously, watch it and you'll see why!
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Post by Guest Thu Feb 12, 2009 1:32 am

I just found some more maddening information on Yahoo. Here is a link stating that she gets 490 in food stamps prior to having the octups and on top of that she get disability for three kids and it also stated that in cali for a low income family they can get like 793 per child for disability so that brings her total to 2300 at least. Also gave a website where people can donate to help support her kids(are you friggin serious? In this economy ppl are trying to fend for themselves and having hard times)
news link http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090212/ap_on_re_us/octuplets;_ylt=ArnqTnLIt8YqGG.FnWAqm.EuQE4F;_ylu=X3oDMTE5MGU5cGc1BHBvcwM0BHNlYwN5bl90b3Bfc3RvcmllcwRzbGsDdGF4cGF5ZXJzbWF5

Her website with blogs and donation info
http://www.thenadyasulemanfamily.com/

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Post by ladydy Thu Feb 12, 2009 9:31 am

Shannon, that is unbelievable about CA paying her hospital bill....I've read that their government is so broke they are considering closing government offices 1 or 2 days a week.

Michelle, I've had IUI's but my dr wouldn't perform the IUI if I had more than 3 eggs, which I know it's different with IVF b/c you never know how many will fertilize and to each his own but I personally wouldn't want to pick and choose embryos. I just don't understand the Dr doing it PERIOD. Here is this woman with 6 kids, why does she need IVF. I think the woman is a complete idiot and should have never done it but then legally does the Dr have the right to refuse treatment b/c of personal circumstances? I seriously don't know. I would think they could refuse treatment just b/c they don't want to do it?????

I'm completely convinced it was all for money......
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Post by MichelleL Thu Feb 12, 2009 11:09 am

You know, when you go to the doctor they don't ask you what your income is. Could the doctor have refused to do her IVF? Most likely not considering he was in possession of her embryos. Could he have refused to implant 6 embryos? I don't know because in American you have the right to manage your own medical care. You also have the right to have as few or as many kids as you want. There comes a point when we really don't want the government to have a say in what choices we can make. You know the saying "give an inch take a mile"? What do you think the conservative powers in our government would do if they could control who has families? Would we be like China and only be able to have one? Would we have to fill out a government application to get pregnant?

Do I like having to pay for this chick's kids? Hell no. Remember.....I am writing a check to the IRS for over $5k in a few months. It sucks. My house needs new windows and my eats drinks $400 in formula a month. BUT I am not willing to say a woman should have her tubes tied or be refused a medical procedure or be denied IVF because of public outrage. I am just not ready to give up those rights for me or anyone else not matter how reckless or stupid I think they are.

And I also want to say (and this is very personal) that even though we paid for the IVF (minus what our insurance covered) we still needed help after he came. We spent every dime we had to get him and then couldn't afford the outrageous medical bills that were well over $1 million dollars for his 3 month hospital stay. And that doesn't even count the post hospital medical care. When he came home with a feeding tube I also received disability payments to help with his expenses. He also received medicaid. The medication that made him breath was over $700 a month. We sold everything we could, received help from the government and still ended up in bankruptcy.....my husband's good job wasn't even "good" enough to get thru this. I know there are people who abuse the system but for every parent out to get something there is also a child out there that desperately needs it. And for every stupid moron like the octuplet mom there are mom's like me who didn't abuse anything but needed help so their baby could survive.

That's the other half of my 2cents. I understand why people are upset, I am not trying to defend her per say but I am defending her right....even her right to be a fool.
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Post by ladydy Thu Feb 12, 2009 12:19 pm

I agree it's her right and I DO NOT want the government to get into my personal decisions or take away any of my rights as a woman over my body.

We could all go on forever about it, I know I could but in a month we'll have forgotten about this crazy lady. I just hope all 14 of those kids have a decent life.
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Post by mythreesons Thu Feb 12, 2009 12:37 pm

My point isnt that she should have her rights taken away.My issue is with her not having a way to take care of the 6 kids she currently has much less to add 8 more to that. Her own mother is disgusted with her for doing it.Her mother is the one caring for her 6 kids even before the octuplets and she's struggling doing it. It's basically like she wants to keep having babies but doesnt do the day to day care.

MichelleL- I'm so not judging you or anyone who chooses to have IVF.Nor am I judging you for the help you received or filing bankruptcy. You did it to have one child and I'm sure he's worth every penny and that you'd do it again.However, you have means to support him and don't pawn him off on someone else to be his primary care and then continue to have more kids...To me its not about her rights as a woman, its the fact that she already isn't caring for her 6 kids and doesnt have the means to support them much less 8 more kids. She is abusing the situation, imo.
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Post by rocknrollmommy616 Thu Feb 12, 2009 2:51 pm

*retypes everything shannon said and erases it*

^what she said! Wink
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Post by mythreesons Thu Feb 12, 2009 3:47 pm

Bekah-You crack me up!
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Post by rocknrollmommy616 Thu Feb 12, 2009 4:12 pm

i try ^_~
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Post by Kim Thu Feb 12, 2009 5:36 pm

just skimmed some here too...Diana, if it is okay I would like to talk to you more about the IUI, my BFF in the whole wide world is on her 3rd try. You can email me at kimmie22377@cox.net if you would rather talk about it there.
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Post by MichelleL Thu Feb 12, 2009 6:39 pm

I was going to ask you Diana, if it's not too personal, did you conceive Aubrey with the IUI? We tried for 8 months and either I over stimulated (so freakin' painful) or the sperm just didn't make contact or something....but it didn't work for us. That's when we ended up in the IVF cycle.

Kim - I feel for your friend! It's so hard trying and nothing happens! :-( Sending her baby dust....
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Post by Kim Fri Feb 13, 2009 1:15 pm

the hardest part with my BFF is that she has really bad endometrosis, which she had surgery for, combined with her hubby having a low sperm count and viability...it just sucks because she would make the best mom. Her insurance doesn't cover anything, so they are running out of options due to finances...and the worst of all she wasn't thinking after one of her IUI's and the HCG hormone was still present in her system from her injections...and she tested and got a BFP, only to have her heart broken when she realized it was from the shots and not a real baby.
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Post by mythreesons Fri Feb 13, 2009 1:24 pm

Aww Kim thats so sad! Poor thing!!What about a surrogate? My heart goes out to your friend!
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